Wake up Maggie, I think I have something to say to you (graphic: mine)
Last October, the entire staff of Slime magazine attended the wedding of our much-loved Claude the Copy Editor to his charming husband Javier the Freelance Editorial Cartoonist, in beautiful Cardiff-by-the-Sea — just north of sunny, formerly conservative San Diego. It was, like approximately 18,000 other same-gender weddings that took place in California in the all too brief window between the California Supreme Court coming to its senses last May and a slim majority of California voters losing theirs last November, a day none of us will soon forget.
Now, we at Slime love our copy and we love our Claude, so none of us were in the least amused when a bunch of Bible-humping transplants, who apparently relocated to the Golden State seeking easier access to welfare benefits, strip-mall mega-churches and methamphetamine, took away the right of loving couples like Claude and Javier to enter into legal civil marriages.
One of the loudest, and most vulgar, voices behind that travesty at the ballot box was Maggie Gallagher, who heads the National Organization for Marriages Denied People Like Our Beloved Claude and His Husband Javier, or as it’s commonly known NOM — an organization that may or may not be a front for the Church of Jesus F Christ of Latter Day Saints.
NOM (pronounced gnome) recently launched a television ad campaign in response to the overwhelming victories for common sense, justice, equality and secularism in Vermont and Iowa.
We, here at Slime magazine, are exceedingly and demonstrably saddened to report that Victoria, our video and media critic, died in mid-laugh at her first viewing of NOM’s Gathering Storm-troopers for the Lord video.
Victoria is survived by her parents, Seth and Bette, her brother, Binky, and her white standard poodle, Oodle. Vickie, we will miss your intelligence and your voice. We will soldier on, in your memory, against Maggie Gallagher and the evil forces of theocracy in our beloved country.
On behalf of the entire staff of Slime magazine, I wish to state that we, at Slime, cannot and will not stand for theocracy rearing its ugly head here in California, nor in any corner of this great nation of ours.
See also: Free speech is sacred
Comments
11 Comments so far. Comments are closed.Is that lesbian stubble on her chin?
She is a piece of shit. Scum, dirt, trash, a rat. I look forward to her on history’s pages of bigoted advocates,
Say hi to Joe McCarthy, Jefferson Davis, and every pigheaded man who was against your right to vote you stupid fuking whore
I’m venting…
What makes someone like Maggot so evil.?
Is she so focused on gay marriage because of some total dysfunction in her own life. As the rest of the world sees her evil, she too will bit the dust.
There must be a special place in Hell for people like her.
“Is she so focused on gay marriage because of some total dysfunction in her own life”
Yes – it’s one of the 7 deadly sins called “gluttony”.
Look at Jerry Falwell, Matt Barber, Rick Warren and other infamous gluttons – they also have (or had in Falwell’s case) the same homosex obsession. Falwell tried to have all the gays executed in the 80′s, and he was as big as a house by the time he croaked.
I have nothing against overweight people – just gluttons who’d rather spend their time “correcting” everyone else’s “sins”, while believing their God isn’t watching them and their own sins…..in cinema scope.
Vent away!
Soulfource founder and former Falwell ghost writer, Mel White, once revealed in an interview that Rev Falwell was seriously addicted to refrigerated cupcakes.
You can’t make this shit up.
Maggie’s ‘husband’ is a tournament bridge player who spends as much time as possible traveling away from home to play with his male partner.
Maggie is attempting the entire nation in a crusade to force her husband to have sex with her.
Give up, Maggie, buy a nice dildo and leave us all alone.
Buy a dildo? She IS a dildo!
In June 2006, Maggie Gallagher was a speaker at a Cato Forum, reported on:
http://www.equalityloudoun.org/?p=337
Maggie Gallagher told her personal story at the Cato Institute forum in June. It seems that she had premarital sex, was impregnated, and was unable to convince the father to marry her. Her feeling of victimization as a single mother is what drives her mission to return the institution of marriage to its former role as authoritarian regulator of all sexuality. If same sex couples are denied the dignity and security of legal recognition, and GLBT people are demonized in the process, that’s just collateral damage.
http://www.cato.org/event.php?eventid=2935
A Record of that event and Maggie was a speaker
Topic: Gay Marriage: Evidence from Europe?
Interesting…
I love the “Christianity is on the decline” headline.
I love that phony cover, but every time I see that picture of her I nearly toss my cookies. Bleh!
Imagine the sheer horror of having to look at that pic for several hours while working on the parody cover. At one point, I replaced the Maggster with the alien from Alien just to give my eyes a break.